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Beam me up Scottie
I didn't think that my life could become anymore convoluted but as of this afternoon it did. There I was trying to tidy and clean my house, Amy was with pregnant daughter, her Mummy was at work in a 'no interuptions, all-day meeting' when the phone rang and a tearful pregnant one announced that she was in pain, frightened and couldn't cope. After a long calming down session it was agreed that two paracetamol and a warm bath would be a good move, her partner was at home so he could look after Jack and Amy, and I would phone her in 2 hours. So, 2 hours later I was in my car going over to her place to collect the Grandchildren and she was getting things ready for a trip to the hospital.
Here I sit, upstairs Amy is in the cot in the 'babies room', they are still here as their kitchen is not finished, Jack is asleep in the spare room, Amy's Mummy has gone to bed 'cos she is tired, Hubby and Amy's Daddy are busy doing the kitchen, I am cooking another dinner, this one for the workers, pregnant daughter is in hospital, available NICU cots are being hunted down, and I have a bare Christmas tree residing in the sitting-room.
Just dashed off for an hour or so. Phone call from the pregnant one, much huffing going on but luckily not a lot else. They have given her the first Betamethasone jab to help baby's lungs mature, second one in the morning, if Poppy hasn't made an appearance, and they are still on the hunt for a vacancy in a NICU. It is prem labour but it could stop, heres hoping.
Christmas is becoming more and more of a shambles the closer we get. I'm just resigning myself now to not trying to plan, just cope as things happen is my new ethos.
The pregnant one is still with child. The regular tightenings continue but without the accompanying pains, so she went home yesterday afternoon. I had tried to get cover for me yesterday but no one was able to swap, in fact, my team leader, who knew what was going on, phoned in and took a 'crisis' day, whatever that is, which left me with double the work. At least it kept me occupied.
The Christmas tree is now decorated so we are becoming slightly festive in this madhouse. Hubby is confident that Amy and her Mummy and Daddy will be back in their own home on Friday, hurrah a nights sleep not abruptly disturbed by a fractious toddler.
Time
The days rush by inexorabably towards Christmas Day and I tag along desperately trying to catch up, I would guess that it's not going to happen. I feel that this year is really destined not to be the best Yuletide ever, perhaps it is better not to have huge expectations as they are more difficult to fulfill.
Work yesterday was very foggy but all my pregnant ladies were happy and so clinic was almost fun. I was on-call last night, and one of the women booked for a homebirth was 'niggling' however, the other on-call midwife decided, quite rightly I think, that the weather conditions were too dangerous for us to go driving miles down country lanes and so advised the unit that anyone who was booked for a homebirth would have to go in. It must have worked because I heard nothing all night. I think that there should really be a huge rethink about this sending midwives out alone in the middle of the night, in all weather, to places they are unfamiliar with. The on-call Docs have escorts/drivers, perhaps it's time we started travelling in pairs when on-call, or having drivers.
Pregnant daughter is still fecund, baby Poppy is hopefully saving his/her appearance until 2007, the longer the better particularly as s/he is breech at the moment. I'm searching for moxibustion sticks at the moment, anything is worth a try to encourage him to turn.
Happy Christmas to all
Christmas breakdown
Back to work yesterday to discover that systems had broken down over the Yuletide and so the work had log-jammed and there were women to be appeased. Basically, anyone who was mobile had gone home on Christmas Eve, but their discharges had not found their way to our office, so we didn't know about them. Just to confound things even more there were 2 homebirths on Christmas day, and with Community Midwife staffing levels deliberately low, that ensured that the days work would be chaotic anyway. Only 6 midwives on duty, and 4 of those at homebirths. Throw into the pot the fact that no-one works both days of Christmas and that ensured that continuity of awareness regarding the situation on Christmas Day meant that no-one chased up and checked that all work. was covered the previous day. Just to make it even more interesting was the fact that another local maternity unit had obviously experienced similar breakdowns in communication and had not conveyed to us that women who had given birth there had gone home and needed visiting. I spent yesterday apologising profusely for something which was a hospital error and answering my phone to be told about another woman and baby needing a visit. One of those visits, I was given no warning, turned out to be extremely sad, when I know all the facts I will be in a better position to write about it.
Our Christmas was noisy, but just what Christmas should be about. We saw all those most important to us, albeit that son-in-law spent most of the time in bed with sickness, at least he made the effort to come. My pressie from Hubby was tickets to see The Sound of Music plus a night in a 4-star hotel in March, wonderful especially as Connie Fisher will still be playing Maria.
Pregnant daughter is still plodding along with her 'irritable uterus', just hope that Poppy is not as irritable as her present abode. Amy and Co moved back home on Christmas Eve, how wonderful, we can stamp up the stairs and shout to each other again.
Happy New Year?
On Wednesday I visited a family whose baby had been born on Christmas Day. It was one of the visits from another unit that had not been given to us before, all the more worrying since baby had been admitted to NICU and the parents had taken him home, against advice. I had only met the Mum once antenatally as they had just moved into the area, but my initial impression was that she was a sensible, intelligent woman so her action in taking baby home, against medical advice, seemed out of character. When I arrived she was genuinely pleased to see me. We had a chat about her rapid labour and the birth of baby on Christmas Day and then I asked her about NICU and why baby had been there etc. Apparently baby had found it difficult to maintain his temperature and this had affected his breathing and his heartrate so he had been initially placed in an incubator but after 12 hours was fine and had been cot-nursed with no further problems. The brief discharge details that I had been given mentioned that baby would be going back for some tests so I asked Mum what the tests were for, 'They think that baby has Down's Syndrome, come and see him and see what you think'. Well, I looked at this little baby, he has got slightly slanting eyes, but so has Mum and he did put his tongue out a couple of times, but otherwise I found it difficult to pick up any of the 'signs'. Certainly his muscle tone is good and, for a 36 weeks baby he is a good size, over 6lbs. The position and size of his ears is entirely normal and his hands and the palmar creases appear fine. I sat cuddling him and told Mum just what I was seeing, a lovely little baby.
Yesterday I went and saw them again. Everyone was in the kitchen and I was welcomed into the heart of the family. Baby's Dad and Uncle were there, Uncle holding the baby, Mum was busy taking cakes out of the oven, and older brother and sister were excitedly showing me their Superman and Fairy outfits. We chatted for a while and then I asked if they had taken baby for his blood test, and when would they have the results. Dad took my hand and said that he just returned from being given the preliminary results, he raised his eyebrows and smiled as he told me that the results so far were saying that his baby had Down's Syndrome but that he knew they were wrong, they had made a mistake, God would not do that to them, to their baby. Test results are often wrong, miracles do happen and if they don't accept it, baby will be fine. Nothing has ever prepared me for this scenario, nothing has ever prepared them for this scenario, I would expect sorrow, horror, anger, resentment, and yes I suppose initial disbelief, but this sincerity, earnestness, trust in God to make it different I found so much more difficult to talk through, so much more upsetting.
Mum and I went upstairs with our tea and for a cuddle with baby. Alone I asked her if she felt the same way as her Husband, she didn't really answer me but said that the Doctors seemed too keen to get everything catagorised. I replied that I thought that if it were my baby I would want to know if baby were different, but that I wasn't sure if I would want him labelled, I wouldn't want expectations put on him because of a diagnosis, any more than any other child, all children are different. Words are never enough, how do you illustrate such emotive feelings, all I know is that today you have a lovely baby boy, who will grow up and will change and who has got a family around him who love their Christmas Boy.
I didn't cry, but I do feel deep sorrow for them. For baby, and the tests starting next week to see if he has any heart, eye or intestinal problems. For his parents, having to take their newborn for medical scrutiny. For the social challenges which may occur in the future and the battles they could all have to fight. What I keep imagining though is the joy they felt, as devout Christians, when there son was born on Christmas Day. The worry when he was taken to NICU. The relief when he responded by just being warmed up slightly. The numbing sensation when the Doctors told them of their suspicions, and now, who really knows? I don't.
Movement, or lack of
Hubby and car were brought home yesterday by a tow-truck, the cam-belt has gone and, according to SIL, it has also mangled the valves. They both spent yesterday bending over the engine with glum faces whilst the rain relentlessly targetted their backs. Brave soldiers that they are they jeered at its efforts to make them abandon their task, SIL looked up and challenged the elements 'If thats the best you can do, then you might as well give up'. With that a brilliant flash lit up the sky and a huge clap of thunder shook the ground, they gathered their tools to them and raced indoors. Hubby's car is sitting there, bonnet ajar, engine innards exposed, and two nuts (not Hubby and SIL) lost for ever in amongst the gravel. Hubby is not a happy man.
The moxibustion sticks have been tracked down and acquired by marvellous niece, now we shall be able to attempt the 'tree-huggers' solution to a breech presentation. I do feel that having daughters going through pregnancy, childbirth and breastfeeding is allowing me an amazing perspective on my job, I just wish that it didn't also incorporate such stress.
Tonight we are going to friends to usher in the New Year, apparently there has been a mud-slide on the most direct route to their house so I shall be negotiating the single-track lanes instead. I hate single-track, winding roads. Not so bad at night because at least you are warned of oncoming cars by their headlights, during the day I have been known to sit at the beginning of the lane, wait for another vehicle, preferably a tractor, to go first, and then follow. My rationale being that if some maniac is coming too fast in the other direction, the lead vehicle will get hit and not me, it's called protecting yourself.
Talking of protection, my manager issued us with personal alarms on Friday. I tried it out when I got home, it certainly alarmed the cats, they must have achieved 60mph as they fled the kitchen. I then demonstrated my new toy to Jack and his Mummy, I did warn them first but this was obviously not enough as afterwards Jack solomnly took my hand and said he needed dry pants and trousers 'Not my fault' he said sorrowfully,'It was Nanny's alarm, too noisy'. I shall consider it a success then, any would be attacker will flee at high speed whilst wetting his pants.
HAPPY NEW YEAR