midwife's muse

Of work and play

Still here! Can anyone out there tell me, in simple language, how to put the name of my blog in larger letters?

Right, on with my blog. Warning - Do not get suncream in babies eyes. Amy has such pale skin that she is almost blue so we are really diligent about hats, suncream, covering up etc. Today the Thursday club came back to mine after the music for toddlers group, I had set up the garden with all the paraphernalia for entertaining toddlers on a hot day, paddling pool, sun tent, towels, toys blankets, Pimms........well the Pimms was for the adults, and I was looking forward to a good chat and catching a few rays. Instead I spent 2 hours consoling a very sad little girl whose eyes had puffed up, were sensitive to the light, and were obviously really sore, essentially Amy and Nanny were stuck indoors whilst everyone else, including the person who smeared the suncream in Amy's eyes, enjoyed the food, drink and sunshine.

Jack's Mummy had a scan on Monday, baby and heartbeat seen, repeat scan in 6 weeks if nothing else happens before then. Tomorrow and Saturday Jack is staying with Nanny and Grandad whilst his Mummy and Daddy go away for couple of days, I hope the weather stays fine, childcare is so much easier when you can be outside.

Work continues to stress me out. I feel really bitter toward the government, there's no point blaming the managers, or even the Trust board, for the changes that are being implemented. I can't speak for other units, or even other areas within our Trust, but I do know that the effects of the cutbacks we are having to make will definitely affect care, and I am afraid could easily lead to adverse outcomes. I don't want to be deliberately placed in this position. The other day I visited a couple who had just had their third baby and the husband was saying how amazing midwives are, and how we should be paid more. I started to come out with my usual response ' It's such a rewarding job, the money would be good but I gain satisfaction from giving good care and seeing women through their pregnancies, birth and afterwards, so more money is not an incentive to do the job', and I suddenly realised halfway through that it isn't true anymore, my job satisfaction has been eroded to such an extent that the 'happiness' element, which compensated for the pay and conditions, has been replaced by an 'angst' component which is overshadowing everything, I'm doing the job I trained for and that I loved.

Now for the really bad news - the World Cup starts tomorrow. Enough said.

8.6.06 22:50